Grey

Standing up for what I believe in. I have been struggling with this for the past few years now.
As a kid, I remember what it was like – when I believed in something-I protected it (even if it seemed insignificant to somebody else.)

But lately I’ve been struggling.
What is it with people like me anyway?
One minute I’m on fire for God. One minute I have my eyes fixed on the cross and I remember what His Love does for me and want everybody else to know it too.
And the next minute I’m too shy to talk about God, and want to take my life in a slightly different route from His perfect plan.

After that I’m falling quickly and my world is crumbling. But thankfully God constantly loves me no matter what- and out of His Grace, He catches me despite of my sins. And I am reminded of His amazing Love again.
God is Love. 
I forget easily and get distracted oh so simply. But there’s hope for people like me and I’m never too far.

 

 

John 15: 4,5 Remain united to me, and I will remain united to you. A branch cannot bear fruit by itself; it can do so only if it remains in the vine. In the same way you cannot bear fruit unless you remain in me. “I am the vine and you are the branches. Whoever remains in me and I in him, will bear much fruit; for you can do nothing without me..”

Love
Jeffy

 

No shame

I want to SCREAM it to the world

But I want to do it quietly <3

I want to Celebrate Him And my Life Right now

'cause although it appears imperfect -

IT's EXACTLY WHAT I NEEd

exactly where I want in Life.

Everything is perfect in the Lord.

(no matter what others' say :D)


--

This was some spontaneous writing that I did earlier, and it remains unedited because I didn't want it to edited :D

- Love
Jeff

 

Why Serve? :D

Hey :),
 Here is something I wrote for an English Test. It roughly and briefly explains why I think everybody should be involved in some form of positive "service"(and by that I mean, helping others out, keeping only the uplifting of others in mind - for absolutely no personal benefit.)

     Positive change in society begins only when its smallest and most important units - its individuals - begin to think and act positively. Citizens involved in service begin to understand that the world is much bigger than themselves and their problems. They also begin to obtain a different perspective- one which helps them see that their lives needn't be wasted, but can be full of joy and be used to change other lives as well. By this, both the one who is served and the one who serves is benefited. If we want our county to change, we need to see that we are an integral part of it, and by our actions show those around us, through service. 

I know I've said "for absolutely no personal benefit" and then , in the passage mentioned that " by this, both the one who is served and the one who serves if benefited" - and it sounds contradictory, but - it isn't . What I mean is personal benefit will roll in once we focus on other things, besides ourselves. 
    
   I'm not saying that I am an somebody who is an extremely experienced person in the field of Service. 
Au contraire , I am aware of how much I painfully lack in giving back to the society. But I will strive, to maybe become that person someday. One of the main reasons for my posting this here, on this blog, is so that it remains (for however long this page may exist) as a reminder for myself. 

 // Have been Missing In Action for several months mostly because I have been focussing on growth and taking a break-in general. I'm SUPER EXCITED to be writing here again :). Thanks for reading. God Bless :D
Love
-jeff

not knowing what to do next.

This subject bothers me every once in a while. And lately, it's bothered me a little more than usual.
This is probably because I'm in that point in life, between school and college, (well, technically I'm already in college, but yeah. ) where-in addition to the constant nagging I hear inside my head, my thoughts about not liking the place where I'm at, mixed in with questions about what I really want- there are these people in every direction who want to KNOW, information that is probably useless to them anyway.

So, what're you going to do next?

But of course they ask anyway.
And I don't blame them really. Because I, a little shamefully, admit, to being in that group of people who want to know. ( I already ask the question "so, what do you want to do next?" a little excessively to people, mostly to those who are younger than me, whose stages of lives I have already stumbled across.I don't know why I do this, I seriously don't.
 I try to stop myself, but then when my mind draws a blank and I have nothing else to say to them, in the middle of the conversation, the words automatically come out and oddly enough, I don't even regret it.)

Has your mind drawn a blank in the middle of a conversation? NO PROBLEM! 

Obviously, not every person, is undergoing agony, (similar to mine) when I ask them the question . Some people ( the beautiful, wonderful people from the land of "IAlwaysKnowWhereI'mGoing"- which, unfortunately does NOT exist.) delight, and even wait to be asked the question. So they can tell me, that things are going exactly as planned, and surely enough they're exactly on track, and where they want to be in their lives.
These people amaze me, and I must admit, there were numerous times when I've wished that I could be more like them.
But.
 Thank God for the internet.
Things changed, when I realized that I wasn't the only one who didn't know. Not the only one, who felt like they were stuck to a place they didn't exactly like, and was watching , simply watching everybody else happily get on track and move forward. At some point, I've realized that not everything is going to be under my control and not everything is going to go as planned.
And that sometimes, it's okay not to know. No matter how many people disapprove of it.

Because, like everything else in life, this "state-of-not-knowing" is ,also, bound to change.

*(none of these pictures belong to me :D)*